Obstacle or Opportunity...?

Every flower must grow through dirt.

God is notorious for doing His work in mysterious ways... Lately I have been able to witness God's mysteriousness first hand. I can't help but question God when i find myself in the midst of a storm right after praying for peace... it seems that when i pray for something specific i am faced with the hardship of what i prayed for... like praying for patience and then being faced with an opportunity to be patient. Sometimes i find it hard to see God's purpose in what is happening and take everything so personally. The reality isn't that God is trying to beat me up or that I have horrible luck... I think the reality is that I am a human in a fallen world where bad things happen, obstacles appear and God gives me an opportunity to grow.

It seems that opportunity often appears as an obstacle-- one that at most times seems impossible to overcome but through God we find an opportunity to glorify Him.

Thank God for obstacles... i would be a mess without them.

"Opportunity's favorite disguise is trouble."

-Frank Tyger

Success...

So I do not claim to be a writer. In fact i am terrible with gammer. While reading my posts you may find many errors so please bear with me... this blog is is an outlet for my thoughts and such, and also something for me to do while being a stay at home mommy.

This morning i woke up feeling successful. The sky was clear and blue and Harper was in a good mood (which makes a big difference on my day let me tell you!). Maggie was still sleeping so i got a head start on some chores i needed to get done. Lawrence made some coffee in the french press this morning before he left for work, so i poured myself a mug of what was left and added my favorite creamer (Italian Sweet Cream) and gulped in down. While Harper was watching his morning cartoons I just watched him and couldn't help but adore his every movement and be amazed at how much and how fast he has grown. Then it hit for the first time since being a mom... the name MOM. I am a mom... is this for real? Not only am I just a mom but a mom of 2 at that!!!

Where have I been?.....

I think i must have been in some kind of post pregnancy fog for the past 20 months... I feel like I finally woke up today and am fully present in all thats going on around me. Watching Harper play and listening to Maggie breathe while asleep. Awakening to the fact that I am a MOM was quite satisfying... it isn't a college degree, or a high paying job, it doesn't have a fancy name or any of such... But i felt SUCCESSFUL. I think i have achieved not exactly what i had set out to do but something better. How did i get so blessed to be able to witness two little miracles grow and ultimately change my life?

GOD is good

And Then there were TWO!!

Welcome...

Maggie Sue Lumley

born: December 13, 2010

@ 12:07pm

6 pounds 2 ounces

19 inches long

Phasing...

It has been awhile since my last post and a lot has taken place and even more has changed.

I am 25 and even though i am half way through my 20's i still find myself wondering who I am. I am not sure if i should have this all figured out yet or how long it will take but apart of me knows it will be a lifetime till i know the answer to that question... Who am I?

I have many identities yet i am not fully secure in any of them... In all of them i am still growing. Maybe that is what life is, always growing.

I am now a mom of 2! Harper is almost 20 months (over a 1 1/2) and Maggie is going to be 3 months on March 13th. I think this has been the most challenging time in my life thus far. Transitioning from a life that revolved around ME; my wants & my needs, to a life revolving around my family and consumed by my children. Which leads to me to question even more than ever Who I am.

Who is Dena, what does she want from life, where does she want to go, and when does she want to take a shower? ha ha

Life: the process of finding ones self while breathing.